Sunday, January 18, 2009

Trip to Port Stephens


Being with a sibling again after a prolonged absence can be a very revealing experience. As well as the joy and instant connection (maybe not all people have this), after a while you can recognise aspects of your own behaviour or character displayed by the other. In addition to the reflection this causes (always interesting to see yourself through your own eyes, but from the outside instead of the inside), the thought crosses your mind that growing up together, with the same (or very similar) morals, lessons and guidance given by parents can result in quite similar tendencies.

For example, my sister and I are both pretty fussy about food. Not so much that we only eat sandwiches with the crusts cut off and divided into triangles, but more that we generally want good quality, more healthy food: meat without hormones or animal feed, less deep-fried, mass-produced, factory churned-out crap, more fresh fruit and vegetabl
es. Furthermore, we can sometimes get so hungry, yet desirous of only something that fits our specific hunger, our want for a certain taste and feeling in our mouths and bellies and minds, a certain kind of holistic satisfaction that we bumble around looking for that meal (without really knowing what it is that we want exactly), all the while growing more tetchy and short-fused because we are hungry and want that quite specific thing that we cannot always put our fingers on.

We can also be somewhat judgemental of others who don't show politeness (simple "excuse me's" or 'thank you's" or "please's") or display a particular lack of common sense. I prefer to think that this is because we judge ourselves as harshly; rather than us being close-minded and intolerant. In addition to these perhaps less positive recognitions are the many laughs, shared quirkiness and past memories, not to mention new ones being made.

Being with my sister again after over a year and half away (and being together for the longest time for about 8 years), I am struck by her energy, creativity, compassion, kindness and patience. Despite working long hours as a nurse, giving her all to care for others, she still makes cakes, thinks of nice, interesting activities, creates t
asty meals, plays with her son and sees her friends, and more, on her days off. Looking back to when I worked full-time, those 5 days a week of being engaged somewhere else for 8+ hours a day... I would come home and barely have enough energy, motivation or creativity to bother to make a nutritious and yummy meal for myself, let alone make the effort to be active and creative. Just as with my brother (whose sense of humour, creativity, determination, optimism, adventurousness and more never fail to lift my spirits and motivate me), my sister is an inspiration to me.

Having grown up with our brothers and/or sisters, we know them in a way we rarely know our friends. Yet this special relationship and ability to recognise our own faults or weaknesses as well as strengths is possible with almost anyone we meet or observe. All those people we pass in the street have their own thoughts, belief systems, moral c
ompasses (hopefully), dreams, connections, loves and fears can be equally revealing and inspiring to us if we give them - and ourselves - the chance.

Thursday, January 8, 2009

Sixth stop: Australia

Sydney, looking for a job. There must be hundreds here, but unlike most places I've been the agencies are not that approachable, it seems (or even open until mid-January). I know I should just take my C.V. everywhere I want to work...surprisingly enough takes guts.

So here I am, eating a really spicy salami salad wrap in a lovely little cafe/flower shop on Oxford St. (a family-run affair or I would immediately apply), and the only other customers sitting in this small back garden are...Frenchies. I cannot tell from where, but what really are the chances? I still find it odd to hear French voices and accents somewhere so far away and British, but I forget that New Caledonia is not that far (compared to France or QC), so it shouldn't come as such a surprise.

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Have you ever created a lie that's gone on so long you've eventually started to believe it yourself? Where, unless you concentrate, that fictional world has become, even to the creator, intertwined with your daily life or, more simply, a given that merges with all the others?

The one bugging me now started about 10 years ago, when I turned a couple of nights drinking in a cocktail bar into a few months of work (funnily enough I no longer recollect the name of the establishment, although for some reason I think it included 'banana',) so I could get a job in a different bar. In a different city.

This all comes about, I think, from some current slight doctorings of my C.V. in order to procure some kind of casual employment in Sydney (so far with no luck). The main thing I've done, in fact, is really reduce my experience...and extended a one year stint in a cafe to 4... not too terrible a white lie, surely? I've always (yet only very recently rediscovered) the love I have of the differentiation - including wording - between a white and a black lie. Are there other tones, one wonders?

No-one at either bar knew I'd told a fib about my experience...and very few people here know (or will know once I get a blimming job) that I never really worked on the espresso machine all that much - in all honesty I rarely did make coffee, spent most of my time on the grill - but it is bothering me a little nonetheless. Partly because I now have 2 versions of my C.V. and want to be sure I keep track of who has been sent which one, partly because I really want some work (for various reasons) and don't see why someone can't just walk up to me and offer me a job on the spot. Typical job seekers' lament. Funnily enough, being somewhere a mere 2-3 months means you don't really care what you do - no, Samantha's occupation still doesn't interest me - but it can be even harder to find something when you are in this situation.

Wish me luck - I'm starting to think I might need it! (Or possibly just a 3rd version of my C.V.....)